Sometimes, some days…. It crawls deep within my mind. It’s there. I wan’t to be able to get out, go in to the city, go on a visit as my own self like, a woman. Just to scared and wondering if it would be better to leave everything as it is right now, being who I always have been. I know I don’t want it but hell, I am scared!!!
I don’t have a pussy and I’m not a pussy…. But right now it seems to be I don’t have a pussy but I’m a pussy, just to scared!!! It’s not that I never experienced the feeling, going outside and it went great. I can’t help myself thinking about it but also saying it’s different just because it wasn’t in my surroundings. What will people make off me, you know my neighbours, people you meet when getting groceries…. Just to scared!!!
I do have time, almost one year to work on myself before the treatment starts, but I don’t want to bother about it at that time, and I know, the feeling is strong but still, I’m scared!!!
Luv ‘n greets
Amanda